I've created the habit of doing every single one of these...just never at the same time. Who says you can't do it all at once? It should be like riding a bike, yes?
Join me in a month of Efficiency and Peace. What do you do that feels really productive with little effort and creates ease and peace in the process? Please share in the comments below. I would love to know!
Here are mine...all starting tomorrow...again! ;)
Things that work miracles in creating peace and efficiency in my life:
1)Meal planning once a week
2)Writing MIT list the night before (Most Important Things list- 3 things- that's it!)
3)Getting up early...like 5am every day and allowing myself quiet, reflective time, reading or writing time BEFORE the day begins with my girls or the days tasks
4) Cutting fruits/veggies, prepping and storing all snack foods for self and girls once a week
5)Light exercise...a walk or some yoga poses, shaking or dancing once a day
6) Looking at the week ahead on Sunday
7) Looking/assessing at finances (personal/biz) every day even if it's a quick check
8)Prepping any necessities for girls the night before...dance bags, lunches, etc.
9) Meditating at least 15 minutes every morning
10) Flexibly blocking my work and Mama schedule and sticking to it, staying singularly focused whether I am with girls or with a client, exercising or online
11) Technology breaks. No tech on Sundays and finishing up online by 10pm.
Welcome June...my birthday month! Woohoo!
Tonight I let the sadness come.
I feel disconnected from my children, still there and going through the motions to feed and bathe them but distant…
And tonight I choose gentleness.
Instead of judging and condemning myself again…
For closing my raw heart…
I walk to fill up another glass of milk and I say…
It is okay.
You can distance yourself.
Your heart matters too.
So I do.
And I soften.
And I am gentle…
With myself and
Even more so with my children.
I float up and just keep moving.
Allowing this space from the intensity of the ground level…
And it is okay.
I still love.
I still feel peace and presence…
I don’t want to stay here forever…
Too many years were spent floating and removed.
But for tonight
It is okay.
It is a welcomed reprieve.
An ethereal breath.
I love and forgive me tonight.
Tonight I let the sadness come.
Tonight I choose gentleness.
Have you ever thought of writing a family mission statement or a list of family agreements? Do you encourage your children to participate in the process? I would love to hear your family's or your own personal declaration for how you CHOOSE to embody this life! Please leave a comment below or on Facebook!
I have healthy kids. Many of us do. As my weewomen have gotten older, I’ve realized just how healthy they are. My oldest is almost 4 and a half and my youngest 3 and I can count the number of times they have been sick on one hand. We have never taken medications or any prescriptions so when they are “sick” it is processed through their bodies quickly and efficiently.
Here are 5 things you can do starting tomorrow to keep your kiddos healthy as well. I am not a doctor, in fact my children have not been to the doctor in over a year (or two?), not even for a well baby check up, so of course this advice is contingent on your own beliefs and best judgment when caring for your own children.
1) Let them sleep! I let my kids sleep in as long as they want and if I can’t because we have school or work, I make sure I balance it out at the end of the day.
Example: If they have to get up an hour earlier than their body normally wakes them up because we have a commitment, and bedtime is at 8, we start bedtime routine earlier and they are in bed by 7. Yes, this means that I do not jam pack our days full of obligations and commitments. We do less with more attention and go slower. Zenhabits.net is a great resource for learning to do less with more meaning. Our health is my number one priority as Mama Bear and that sometimes means missing out on events that others make time for. It totally worth it!
2) Eat organic whole foods and green things!
If you do not know by reading the ingredients what is in your food put it back! Check out www.ewg.org for some awesome resources on how to by food products and much much more! Here is a link to the Dirty Dozen list if you haven’t’ heard of it yet. Also find ways to get greens in your kids. Mine tend to eat little bits raw, sometimes in smoothies and I know other Mamas that bake them into brownies. I put an array for fruits and vegetables out at most meals so they can choose and try different things when they are ready. Let your kids pick a weird looking vegetable or fruit at the grocery store to try. Today my girls picked a red cabbage and a turnip. We got a thumbs up for the red cabbage and none of us were too fond of the turnip so I’ll chop it up with our garlic.
Full transparency for those on a budget or state benefits: When I was on the State’s health insurance and nutritional assistance program with my second child, I STILL bought mostly organic milk, meat and produce. When things were tight, I bought quality not quantity to make sure we were getting the food with the most nourishment. In our state you can also use nutritional assistance and WIC at local farmer’s markets. If this is your status…DO IT! It is the health of your family you are investing in and don’t worry about the looks people might give you for “indulging” in organic products! Think about all the money you’ll be saving everyone in the long run, including you, by having a healthy immune system and family!
3) Ignore the “it’s that time of the year” talk!
The biggest hurdle I have found to creating healthy bodies for my little family is the deeply entrenched beliefs and mindset we have about…allergy season, cold season, flu season, back-to-school sickness, holiday illness…. YOU NAME IT…and the list goes on! I even hear parents repeatedly say, “oh, well, it’s about time we get sick again, we’ve been well for 2, 3 4 weeks!” WTF?!!! If beliefs are your biggest hurdle to health, let me know and I’ll hook you up with some resources to get on that!
Nevermind that we bond over our ailments because hey, it’s something we can all relate to, right?! Wrong! I leave conversations that are focused on illness and commiserating about symptoms and dismiss the belief that, well, that’s just life! No, I choose health over building relationships based on sickness. Oh goodness, don’t get me started! :)
When my children come home having ingested some of these beliefs I just remind them, that although many people get sick, we take very good care of our bodies by eating right, sleeping and exercising/playing to stay healthy. That does the trick so far!
4) Drop the sugar! (take a spoon full of honey during “__” season!)
There is absolutely no reason to feed your children sugary snacks on a regular basis. Teach your children that sugar makes your body weak (because it does). It lowers your immune system and makes every system weaker…and I’m not talking huge amounts of sugar. Set limits and educate yourself and your children. Teach them that fruit is sweet and with all the natural sugar alternatives out there now this does not have to be hard.
We eat cookies and cakes and ice cream. We indulge sometimes in brownies and suckers AND we talk about how our bodies feel before, during and after so that they (and always a good reminder for me as well) are aware of how certain things feel. Instead of making sugar a daily reality, turn it into a science experiment and observe and discuss. Today my eldest told me when we went to the grocery store where she is sometimes allowed to use her Kids Club card to get a free cookie, “Mom, I think I just want one cookie because one I feel fine and two makes me crazy!” I’m glad she has this wisdom in her body at a young age. Oh and a spoonful of local raw honey in the morning and before bed.
5) Allow your children to express their emotions!
What do emotions have to do with keeping my children healthy, you ask? More and more research is being done on the direct link between how we process our emotions and the types of illnesses we create in our bodies. There are many books written about this topic. Check out one of Dr. Carolyn Myss’s books from your local library or find a B.E.S.T. practitioner in your area and ask questions. That’s where I started but, there are many other resources out there.
Now speaking practically, our children’s emotions, especially negative emotions, and especially in young children who are less able to regulate their own emotions, usually cause one of two reaction in parents:
1) Fix it, relieve it, soothe it to make it stop because,e let’s be honest, it sucks and hurts our bodies sometimes to see our children upset, angry, sad, frustrated (we call these “yuckies” in our house)
2) Cut it off, squelch it, silence it, forcefully with words or actions bring the behavior and related emotion to a sudden halt because it triggers something in us that is uncomfortable to be with.
Do this instead.
How to deal with strong uncomfortable emotions with your children for maximum health:
1) Don’t give a shit what other people think. :)
2) Breathe…..and again breathe to literally relax your own nervous system so that you can actually do steps 3-5.
3) Acknowledge your own feeling in the moment
"I feel sad or pissed, etc"
4) Acknowledge your child’s feeling whether you agree with it (the behavior or feeling) or not.
“You look upset. I see you throwing your toys on the floor.”
5) Then BE. Just imagine yourself creating a space, a bubble if you will, from your very own heart and this bubble encapsulates you and your child and inside is a feeling of safety and unconditional love. No words or actions are necessary (unless safety is a concern). I’ve done this in the middle of the store during a tantrum. Allow your child to be held and accepted, crazy tantrum and all, in this energetic space until, yes…the emotion let’s go of your child. Most emotions pass in a minute and a half if left to be processed through the body rather than fixed or pushed down. Allow it to do it’s job so that it doesn’t’ get stuck and make your child sick. We have all experienced the results of suppressed emotions in our adult life, aware or not, it is not a pretty sight when they finally surface. Allow your child to feel and then be free. <3
Of course articles and books have been written about all these topics so I cannot do them justice in one blog post, but it felt important to get at least a little bit of information out to those who may need it right now.
And of course all these safe, holistic practices also work wonders for grown-up kids too! ;)
I've been waiting for the perfect time to post my next blog...waiting and waiting and waiting to let all of you know what has been going on and why the lengthy period of time between posts.
But you know what? There is in never a perfect time. The perfect, i'mperfect, time is right now! So here I am. I'm checking in today, this September 25th at 12:59 PM. I'm feelin a little frustrated and very quiet. Readying to go inward (as soon as my 3 year old stops sneaking out of her room and peeking around the corner on her hands and knees). :)
I last posted about "landing." And indeed that was the case. Many people are feeling right now a new relationship with their physical bodies and that is true for me also. I had a very dramatic experience of actually being able to feel my body again. I think my partner thought I was on drugs becausee I kept dragging my feet against the carpet and my hands over smooth surfaces just because I could FEEL them, as if for the first time! The mental and emotional effects have been lovely as well...my body has slowed down to an "earth" pace (think of water cutting a river into rock) and thus my mind and emotions have done the same. I am less reactionary and more thoughtful before I speak. When I honor this change and allow my physical body time to really "feel" a situation, I make better decisions. It has been quite the integration and visceral in a way I never knew possible.
Why am I telling you this? I know that many of you are feeling a shift as well. Maybe you have experienced the opposite and have felt a quickening in your body or thoughts. Maybe you've begun to feel your heart calling you to make a change or feel into a life transition in a way you never have before. Whatever you are experiencing...it is all as it should be. I just wanted to assure all of you that what you are feeling is. Just is.
Try not to judge the shifting. Try to embrace the integration even if it feels foreign. You are becoming more of who you really are...who WE really are! When you feel into what the Universe is calling you to do and do the internal work that is yours, you are healing all of us...you are healing the world! We are moving into a more integrated way of love, peace and joy and listening to your body and your heart is an integral part of making this shift happen!
So, I want to hear from YOU! Check in. Tell me how you're feeling in your body right now. What is true for you right now and know all of it is good and welcomed!
Thank you for reading and allowing me this time to integrate more wholeness into my life! For those of you wondering, I am still taking clients for spiritual coaching and energy readings you need only to contact me through this site or on facebook to get all the details. :)
Many blessings on this beautiful Sunday afternoon!
Now off to help my sneaky little sprite drift off to dreamland...or are we already here? ;)
It has been quite an adjustment this last month after returning from Eden! It's like I was on a natural high immediately when I returned...and then my body was like, wait, this is TOO good and I created situations in my life to screw myself out of manifesting in my "real" life all the wonderful things that happened inside me at Eden!
Have you ever done this?
It's called hitting your "upper limit."
It can look like picking a fight with your partner (this is my fav...blah...poor Steve), procrastinating, yelling at your kids, overeating, not taking care of yourself, really anything that will keep you from focusing on making positive change in your life and bring you right back down into the muckity-muck! I've felt this many times before I know I'm supposed to step into something bigger. It feels like you're being stretched from the inside out.
Why? Because you're expanding into new uncharted territory!!! Exciting but oh-so-scary too!
So instead of heading back to where I feel "comfortable" (which actually, after fighting about the dishes for the 400th time, I realized, really actually sucks!) I've begun LIVING what I learned at Eden and wouldn't ya know, I'm right back on track and ready to share it with ya'll.
So here a simple tool we used regularly at Eden Unplugged and I have used in many other arenas in my life throughout the years!
This works at home, work, social gatherings, classrooms, with kids, with cranky spouses, with friends and strangers alike! And yes, I've tried it with all of the above!
So please, for God's sake and your sanity,
try this at home! :)
1) Sit or stand in a circle...yes, that's right, just like in kindergarden! (also works with two people, so no excuses :)).
2) Take a deep breath together. Do it a few times if it feels a little weird. (yes, we did this in my junir high classromm almost every day)
3) Invite everyone to check in or pay attention to how their body is feeling (giggle, giggle). This could mean physically, energetically, if there is pain, or excitement in the belly, light headed, nervous energy, etc.
4) Invite everyone to share.
b) How there are feeling in there body and
c) if there is anything keeping them from feeling completely present right there and then.
Or come up with a question of your own. We used "What inspired you to come" at our last community gathering and it was so incredible to watch people (many complete strangers) simply begin to connect...
by just sitting in circle together!
Try it. You might like it! :) Let me know what you think by leaving a comment below! :)
Here in the southwest it is a time to get outside and enjoy the incredible warmth and vibration of blooming trees and twiterpated animals! Spring is here! As part of my journey to stay spiritually “grounded” and my journey to “ keep a 3 year old and 1 ½ year old engaged and safe” we decided to dig a mudpit! J
Okay, I must admit, at first I was at a loss…I had a picture in my head of those big pools of mud you see on TV for crazy obstacle course game shows or big lush pits of nurturing mud for those desiring a nourishing bath in the “black gold.” I looked at my backyard and felt overwhelmed. Have you ever felt this way? Like, “why couldn’t I just wiggle my nose or pull on my ear and have a big ol’ pool of mud appear?” Maybe I watched too much Bewitched as a child?! J
My point is…okay…well…I ADMIT IT…I just didn’t want to do the work!!!
I struggled with this for about a week (until the pressure of two highly energized little girls finally broke me down) and I realized…I just have to start with putting the shovel in the ground…
so I did.
Next, dig in! So I did. Dig a little deeper! So I did.
Until I realized, I could start by digging a small mudpit and then see how that worked out. So I did…1.5 ft in diameter and it was brilliant. The girls loved it!
The next day, I dug a little more…made it a little bit bigger and a little bit deeper. Then I watched…waited…even more fun! Sweet! It’s like the energy of that first dig just propelled me forward!
My point - are you having a hard time getting started on something? Anything? Maybe it’s something you HAVE to do. Or maybe something you’ve been putting off for a while, a long while! Maybe it’s something you just KNOW your heart is calling you to do but you’re scared because you’ve never done it before (this is my first mudpit ;) ) or people will think you’re crazy (again, the mudpit example J).
Try not to get overwhelmed…keep the vision of the “big picture” in your mind and then simply put the shovel in the ground. If that feels good, dig in! The rest will practically dig itself!
Isn't it amazing...the people we love the most are the ones who are sometimes the hardest to get along with. I believe this has more to do with energy than the fact that we just "take things out" on the people that are closest to us. I believe that these people, whether our spouses, partners, parents or children, are our closest companions because they are here to mirror back to us the things we most need to learn about ourselves. The conflict or hardship we experience in these relationships is only a whisper from the Universe to look inside. It is our job to transform the energy of conflict, frustration and habitual behavior into something our bodies, minds and souls can integrate more easily into our ever evolving self. So how do we allow this learning to take place when we know WE ARE RIGHT? ;)
STOP TALKING AND BECOME AWARE
Since every relationship in your life is only a mirror of what is on the inside and the lessons you are here to learn, we can take every encounter with another, positive, negative or neutral in stride. We can CHOOSE to be an observer, not of the other but of ourselves, since this is really the only person we have direct control over. So, let's take a stressful or heated discussion with a loved one for an example (it is the holidays after all ;)).
You have within your power to control the energy of the encounter should you choose to. A little know secret is energy can be moved, transformed, manipulated at our will...I know that's out there for some of you, but bare with me. So the encounter is getting heated...first, stop (talking) and be honest with yourself...you can FEEL once a conversation hits a certain point and it no longer serving the best interest of either party. Be honest with yourself and FORGIVE yourself and the other person for, well being HUMAN and ALLOW and ACCEPT that fact! We all let things get out of hand some :) I know, tough first step for some of us...I know it is for me.
Now this is where you might begin getting a couple of stares...but that's okay, because if you want to be at the forefront of nurturing conscious healthy relationships, you may have to FEEL a little weird. :) So, after you've become aware of the situation...take a few deep, belly breaths (there's that breathing thing again). Let the party goers around you are your kids look at you funny, in about 10 seconds, you're going to have more control over everything because you've shifted your OWN ENERGY by BREATHING....okay, better? Now you can move forward from a place that is a little more centered (figuratively and literally...from your belly and heart to be exact).:)
Once you are back in your body and out of your head (thank you beautiful breath), and this is where others may not notice but you may feel a little awkward, maybe even vulnerable (I know it's a dirty word for some of us;))... DO SOMETHING! Stay committed to not talking, and move (away if necessary), smile (that's when you move both corners of your mouth towards your eyebrows), laugh (if the moment moves you) or touch, yes, touch the other person...give them a hug or a pat on the shoulder or if you feel they are still a little "prickly" give yourself a squeeze! :) You will be amazed at how movement, however small, will continue to transform the moment...our bodies are sooooo smart! If the other person can't quite FEEL the shift in energy yet, I like to put my hands together (or hug myself if I'm feeling daring) and assure myself I have taken care of my own stuff through breathing, therefore getting back in my body and releasing the blocked energy through movement. It's amazing how quickly the other person will come around once you've shifted your own energy!
So cheers to the amazing people in our lives who continue to bring about experiences that allow us to take responsibility for our own, ah hem, crap! And cheers to YOU for beginning to breathe and move and laugh again!!! You surely are changing the world one relationship at at time! Namaste!
H ave you ever felt like you’re being pulled in a hundred different directions all at once? You women out there may be asking, isn’t that just the way life is? Do you like to call this dispersion of energy “multi-tasking?” Well, I’m going to pop some of your bubbles (especially the ladies out there)! Multi-tasking is great for doing a lot of things without a lot of consciousness. And recent studies of “multi-tasking” have shown it to be much less effective than focusing on one thing at a time. Okay, I may have lost some of you now because you’re saying, well that’s how I am or that’s how I function…but hear me out (sistas especially…the gentlemen have got this one pretty much down)! What I’m about to say will make you feel less stressed thus decrease illness and boost your immune system and maybe even increase your overall quality of life, especially during this busy time of year!
H ere it is…BLOCK YOUR TIME! Before you begin your week go through each day and decide what you will choose to be present to and BLOCK IT! The secret then is to HONOR YOUR OWN CHOICES! If you block 4pm-6pm for dinner/family time then don’t check your email while the pasta is boiling! I know we all CAN do this, but it doesn’t mean it is to our highest benefit. If you’ve set this time aside for family and dinner…BE PRESENT to your choice! Listen to your kids chatter in the back seat on the way home from practice instead of finishing up that last business call. Make dinner a time to reinvigorate the senses (which will serve in other areas of your life as well J). Listen to the water boil, enjoy the aroma of the sauce (even if it’s straight from the jar)…can you pick out the scent of onion and garlic. Sit down and, now I know this might sound crazy, TASTE and CHEW your food! Enjoy the face time with your roommate, spouse, friends , kids or yourself! J BE PRESENT to what is in front of you…after all YOU chose it!
Block the your time the way you would like to spend it! Go for the ideal! Yes, life will happen sometimes? Of course! But try to honor how and with what or whom you’d like to spend you’re time with. Be completely present with your choice, mind, body and spirit! See how you FEEL? You may actually get more done and be happier and healthier doing it! J
So about three months ago, after taking a couple years to work part time gigs to help pay the bills (oh and have babies!)…I got a REAL job! It was a job I went to school for…practical, financially stable, it would allow me to “work from home” although I would not be able to BE PRESENT with my children, but really from the outside it looked like the perfect opportunity for a “single mom” looking to support herself and two kids! My parents were happy, my baby daddy was happy, my friends were happy for me, and I was…well…relieved to have the pressure off!
So I went to the orientation. I walked into the building ready to take on this new challenge that seemed, by all external measures to be an answer to prayers…but as soon as I entered the room with all the other employees I got nauseas…anxious…shaky… so much so that I had to walk outside. I chalked it up to having been a stay-at-home mom for the last two years and nerves about starting a new job. I tried to “suck it up” and the next 3 days of orientation were like torture internally for me but I continued work another month disregarding every fiber of my being screaming that I made a wrong turn.
I eventually figured out this was a life changing turning point for me. I was in the midst of discerning whether or not to begin doing the healing work I KNEW I was meant to do, but which meant starting my own business (something I knew little to nothing about). But in that moment (and following month of torture J) I realized that I wanted so much more for my life and my girls! I didn’t want them to grow up watching their mother settle for less happiness than we all deserve and so I left. I left and I turned back towards the path I knew was for me…and it worked!!! The Universe supports us! God knows our hearts and guess what…if you listen (especially to your body…a direct conduit of Light) you will begin to know your own heart too and together, with that Source Energy that gives life to EVERYTHING, will create the most beautiful life you can imagine! So cheers to letting go of fear and to the external and honoring the innate wisdom that lies at the center of each of us!